Latest update May 2nd, 2026 12:30 AM
Latest News
- “Oil wealth is not a favour; it is a right” – Seepaul Narine tells May Day rally
- EPA fails to say what mechanisms in place to verify Exxon’s offshore waste discharge
- U.S. warns shippers against paying Strait of Hormuz tolls, ‘donations’
- U.S. Congressman warns of “creeping Chinese influence” in Guyana
- Guyana to Host Inaugural International Compost Awareness Week 2026
Start yuh Christmas early before the traffic tek yuh soul
(Kaieteur News) – Dem Boys Seh if you ain’t start your Christmas preparation yet, you better lef’ this column right now and go find a broom, a mop, or at least a piece of cloth to start wiping something—anything. Because, leh we tell you, Christmas in Guyana is not a season; it is a full-blown construction project, spiritual revival, and social competition all in one. And if you don’t get ahead of it, it gon run you down like de traffic on Sheriff in de afternoons.
Every year is the same thing: Guyanese wait until December 22nd to start “spring cleaning” that shoulda happen in spring. Suddenly everybody discovering a set of cobwebs, old curtains, mildewed ornaments and a mystery bowl in the fridge that predates the last election. By then, the entire country deh running ’bout like ants after somebody kick down the hill.
Meanwhile, the wise ones are already sitting down in their clean, well-decorated homes by December 1st, legs crossed, remote in hand, listening to Andy Williams, Marcia Griffiths and “Long Time Ago in Bethlehem” blasting sweetly while the rest of allyuh punishing.
But no, some ah y’all like the adrenaline. Y’all like the panic. Y’all wait until the traffic stretch from Success to Giftland and then start wailing, “Why this line so long?” As if the road suddenly get pregnant with cars overnight. So hear meh: do yuh shopping early. Because the traffic now bad like a wicked stepfather, and by mid-December, it gon be bad like a wicked stepmother that lose she pension book.
By Christmas Eve night, you should be home already, sittin’ down in a living room smelling like new paint, new curtain, and Pine-Sol. The fairy lights twinkling, the ham already slice off, the ginger beer bubbling, the black cake hiding like it in witness protection. And there you are, listening to the Christmas playlist on your stereo, smiling because you don’t have to join the chaos on the road. Meanwhile, the rest of Guyana stuck in traffic so long they coulda write a thesis before reaching town.
And best of all—you get to brag. Oh, Guyanese love bragging. Imagine the joy of telling people, “Me? I done shop long time.” Watch how their eye turn red-red like pepper. Is the little things that bring Christmas cheer. So fuh meh boys seh—clean early, decorate early, shop early, then sit down like royalty in yuh pristine kingdom. Let everybody else fight up with traffic and last-minute stress. You? You just relaxing and pressing play on “Feliz Navidad.”
Talk half. Leff half.
Share this:
Discover more from Kaieteur News
Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.
Similar Articles
One thought on “Start yuh Christmas early before the traffic tek yuh soul”
THE BLUNT OF THE DAY
Sports
Features/Columnists
Sir. Ronald Sanders
The GHK Lall Column
Weekend Cartoon
Jagdeo and nandalall must go