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Cows, carts, an’ de kaka on de road

Nov 25, 2025 Dem Boys Seh, Features / Columnists

(Kaieteur News) – Bai, dem boys seh if Burnham did love one thing more than he cook-up, was cow pon de public road. In dem days, de four-foot creatures had more rights than de motorists. Yuh car could write off, yuh bonnet could fold up like bed sheet, but de cow? De cow was a national treasure. Touch am, and yuh better had a good lawyer, a good priest, and a good excuse.

Now, to be fair, nobody vex when de animals crossing from pasture to pen. Everybody know even cattle need to go home fuh dinner. But wha we get instead? Cows, horses, sheep, dogs, cats, and the occasional confused goat holding Sunday strolls pon de highway, grazing like de grass sweeter between de white lines. Some even basking pon de warm asphalt in the night like dem on vacation.  Meanwhile motorists doing brake-test at 80 km/h and praying fuh divine intervention.

Dem boys seh back in Burnham time, people didn’t complain too hard, because in dem mind de animals had more official protection than some citizens. Hit a cow and yuh could swear yuh interfere with a government minister. Compensation? Only if yuh count de lecture yuh get.

But hear nah—today de same thing happening again. Animals loose like political promises in election season. De risk of accident rising like GPL light bill. And de time come fuh Parliament to stop moo-moo around and fix de laws. Yes, give de animals dem right-of-passage, but not right of residence pon de public road. De only thing supposed to lie down pon de highway is new asphalt.

And while we talking animal rights, lewwe talk animal wrongs. How long more we allowing horse carts and donkey carts pon de public road? Is like cruelty in slow motion. Dem poor animals pulling load heavier than some Cabinet portfolios. Dem boys seh if we serious about compassion, is time to retire de whole fleet. Send home de horse, send home de donkey, give dem pension and a hammock.

In de meantime, motorists, look out fuh de cow and goat dem. De roads belong to everybody—but not to de cattle pen.

Talk half. Leff half.

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