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Dec 28, 2018 Dem Boys Seh, Features / Columnists
If you got a parrot in you house and all de years you train it to do one thing, you can’t expect it to do something else.
You train you parrot fuh seh yes to everything. “Parrot you want food?” Yes.
Parrot, you want mek love? “Yes.”
Parrot, you want me kill you mudda***. “Yes.”
Fuh three and a half years Soulja Bai been training Charranrass fuh seh one thing—‘Yes.’
‘Charranrass, you like de bottom house drug bond deal?’ “Yes.”
‘Charranrass, you like de closing down of dem sugar estate? “Yes.”
‘Charranrass, You like Volda wuk only deh fuh PNC supporters?” “Yes.”
‘You like de perks wha de coalition boys and girls getting?’ “Yes”.
Dem boys seh everything de man was taught is yes. Suh when he went to Parliament and dem ask him to seh de opposite to yes, he seh none body ever teach him that word. Suh he seh ‘Yes.”
Now dem vex wid him and dem want fuh cause confusion in de country. Dem boys hear dem want to seh 33 is not greater than 32. Before people got to waste time going to court to find out which number is greater, dem boys gun explain it.
Dem seh if you got 65 poulourie;
Anil eat 33;
Basil eat 32.
Who eat de majority?
A—Anil?
B—Basil?
Or C—Nigel.
And if Nigel don’t know de answer ask C fuh C.N.
De argument wha Nigel and some of dem lawyers want to use to bring about a case in de court, is pure jumbie arithmetic.
Dem boys remember de Berbician parents who send dem son to England to study to become a Mathematician. After he graduate de boy return home and start to show off.
He tell ee parents one plus one is three. Dem was shocked and dem decide to question him.
De boy put dem fuh sit down facing de bedroom wall, tek chalk and start fuh do he gymnastics pun de wall.
He spend a whole hour trying to convince ee parents that one plus one equal three.
De mudda was vex. She seh, ”Alright son. One plus one equals three? Hear this. We got two duck in de backyard and we gun cook dem fuh dinner.
You Daady gun eat one and me gun eat de odda one. You gun eat de third one.
Talk half and wonder if Nigel and dem rest of lawyers been to that same school in England wha that bright boy been to.
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