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De New Ministry of Miracles
Dem Boys Seh…
(Kaieteur News) – Dem boys seh Guyana got a strange disease. It ain’t COVID. It ain’t dengue. It ain’t even pothole fever. Is de belief that nothing in dis country can happen unless somebody with a big title, flashing lights and a convoy pass through and sprinkle holy water pon de problem.
De latest outreach meetings prove de point.
People line up from cock-crow morning to tell de Vice President and Ministers things like de drain need cleaning, a pension paper get lost, a land application sleeping longer than Rip Van Winkle, and somebody at an office refuse to answer de phone. By de time de outreach done, hundreds of problems suddenly get solved.
Now dem boys got a simple question: if all dem problems could be fixed in one afternoon, why de bureaucracy couldn’t fix dem before?
It like owning a fire station but every time somebody see smoke, de President got to come personally with a bucket.
Dem boys seh de outreach exercise accidentally reveal a national secret. De bureaucracy functioning like a car with four flat tyres. Instead of changing de tyres, everybody celebrating because de passengers pushing de car faster.
And de people encourage it too. Plenty citizens convinced that a complaint only become important after it reach somebody whose title got enough initials to fill a bowl of alphabet soup.
In post-colonial societies, de cult of personality does flourish better than tadpole in rainy season. People start believing leaders got magical powers. A simple signature become a miracle. A routine administrative task become a heroic rescue mission.
Soon enough, if somebody lose a goat, they might demand a Cabinet outreach. If a pipe burst, they might ask for a ministerial commission of inquiry. If de dog refuse to bark, somebody gon request de Vice President intervention.
Meanwhile, de actual public service sitting in de corner like an abandoned bicycle.
Dem boys seh a good government is not one where leaders constantly rescue citizens from bureaucracy. A good government is one where citizens never need rescuing in de first place.
But miracles make better headlines than functioning institutions.
And dat, unfortunately, is why de Ministry of Miracles always got more customers than de Department of Common Sense.
Talk half. Leff half.
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