‘Jumbie town’

Jul 24, 2023 News, The GHK Lall Column

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Hard truths…

Kaieteur News – Guyanese can’t ketch a break.  They have to deal with a supermajor offshore (Exxon), superman (onshore), and the supernatural in the graveyard.  The latter was what came from a man of the cloth; the quality looks cheap, edges tattered.

I always knew that Minister Edghill was not to be taken seriously, but the jester’s cap sits poorly.  Because the thought is that brother Bishop Edghill has potential, I have long searched for slivers of truth in him.  Finally, success!  There it is! Cemetery Road works delayed due to ‘supernatural forces.’  Supernatural forces mean the dead and the undead and Guyanese ‘frikken both baad’.  Guyanese ‘frikken’ the dead more than they fear the living.  Though mortally afraid of, and dead set against, President Ali and Vice President Jagdeo, two men with less than enlightened spirits, those leaders could still press them to turn a shovel, or move a wheelbarrow, should the need arise.  But, nah when ‘jumbie deh roung’.  The problem-one from the twilight zone, straight out of the crypts-is that the dead roam at will in this society.  Some examples should enlighten the dim.

There are advisers and counsellors in high political places with nothing but dead cells in the cranial cavity.  There are national leaders who are dead set against anything resembling truth, hell-bent against any ray of light.  There are many ministers and more senior public servants who are immersed in the dark arts of governance from sinister institutional graveyards that terrify natives forced to deal with them.  People get sick from going there, call in sick afterwards.  Not I.  Not that ministry or that State agency!

Guyana is the land of the dead, with even the gleam of oil considerably eclipsed by the darkness in the souls of those near to it.  Many proudly boast of PPP heritage, a few of the dreaded PNC.  It is dread of the dead all around, which is why supernatural forces can be so at home here, and not just around Cemetery Road.  I suggest allocating a huge square of Cemetery Road land to Exxon for its golf course, swimming pool, and possibly its HQ. The ghosts of seasons past would be fit to be tied.  There is always the diabolical 2016 oil contract to bind them in knots or push Exxon towards higher roads; everybody ‘duz see jumbie’, not just poor coloured folks.

Now, for more unpleasant news from the other side for the minister-cum-oracular figure-plus spiritual land surveyor: the only supernatural forces present in this darkened country are his fellows in the PPP.  I have names.  The shock would be the first name given, one most known to him.  If the man of God could assist with a name or two that is for truth, light, and justice, then he could be my running mate, should I get around to it (how about that for stirring spirits in the local political haunts?).

Imagine that!  In this 21st oil century, we still have supernatural forces howling, prowling, and scowling on Cemetery Road.  No workers; crippling demonic rackets.  And if the good Bishop is to be believed, it is what comes naturally to Guyanese.  I recommend traveling to Paramaribo for a protective fix, or, to the Middle East, on the President’s next junket.  Since the man of what is supposedly godly, country, public works family (the bishop knows my meaning) and the grand ole party opened this supernatural door, I walk in.

Supernatural forces, sir, are not limited to roaming Cemetery Road alone.  Supernatural forces now plague Regent Road; simply stop by the Office of the Leader of the Opposition for a séance, while national remedial works are suspended.  Then, there is the road to perdition, which is the street on which Stabroek News is located.  The problem is not SN’s spirits, but those in the neighbouring house of mental captivity and darkness.  Along the eastern carriageway, supernatural forces infest the road to Pradoville; dare to step there, and the devil’s own disciples have their many workshops to envelop, with witches’ caverns humming.  No god-fearing Guyanese would be caught dead there; in fact, none is not allowed to set foot in Lucifer’s quarters.  Why, there was even a ghostly Chinese visitor of sinister repute that made his presence felt at a big house there.  If the Bishop wants a dissertation on supernatural forces and where they are, and how they hold the citizens of this country hostage, come to daddy, minister: pull a name from the hat; the initials are in the familiar alphabetical order.

‘My lawd! My gawd!’  Guyana is not Funky Town, Guyana is a ‘jumbie’ town.  Guyanese use to ‘frikken Dutch maan’ and ‘ole higue’ forever, now Americans have replaced those fearsome demons of darkness.  Thank God for the GPL, and the ‘li’l solar powah’.  It was Martin Luther King who said, “I have seen the light.”  Well, he should come to Guyana and see what’s here.  The Most Holy Bishop Edghill could do the honours and escort him along Cemetery Road.  Perhaps MLK could do some preaching, get some honest work done there.  Let the sunshine in.  Nice country, isn’t it?

Disclaimer: The opinions expressed in this column are those of the author. They do not purport to reflect the opinions or views of Kaieteur News.

 

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• ‘jumbie deh roung, frikken both baad’, President Ali and Vice President Jagdeo

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