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Be prepared fuh next Monday!
Dem Boys Seh…
(Kaieteur News) – Dem boys seh all dem parliamentarians who planning to turn up in de National Assembly next Monday better start pack from now. Not suit and tie alone—walk with yuh pillow, yuh sleeping bag and maybe one lil thermos of coffee strong enough to wake de dead. Because if history tell we anything, is that Budget Day gon be one long, winding journey, with no rest stop and plenty bumps.
Dem boys already warning: expect another five-hour marathon. Yes, five hours. De kinda speech that put yuh to sleep, wake yuh up when somebody clap, and then gently rock yuh back to sleep again. Is not hypnosis, is de Budget. One minute yuh counting billions, next minute yuh dreaming about cook-up rice.
De man might be short, but his story very long. And dem boys hear is nothing personal—it’s just his style. From school days, he never did like précis. While other children summarising in five lines, he explaining in five pages. Teacher seh, “Get to de point,” and he reply, “Miss, de point coming, but leh me explain how we reach there first.” And so it remain.
So when de Budget start, don’t frighten if de introduction have an introduction. And de background have a background to de background. By de time de figures come, some parliamentarians gon be on page three of de speech and chapter seven of dey dreams.
Dem boys advising simple survival tactics. Stretch yuh legs before yuh sit. Switch off yuh phone, but keep it close in case yuh need to pretend yuh taking notes while actually checking how long five hours really is. If yuh hearing “as I said before” more than three times, is a sign to fluff yuh pillow.
But leh we be fair. De man like to explain things fully so everybody can understand—whether yuh understand already or not. Is de same story three ways, in case yuh miss it de first time, de second time, or when yuh wake up de third time.
So next Monday, dem boys seh, walk prepared. Because when de Budget done, yuh might not remember everything that was said—but yuh body gon remember sitting down for all of it.
Talk half. Leff half.
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