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Karaoke Konfusion
...Dem boys seh
Kaieteur News- Dem boys seh, deh got a new talent craze in de land. Everybody and dem cousin tunin’ up dem throat to be de next Whitney Houston or Engelbert Humperdinck, or as dem does seh, “de Guyanese Whitney” or “Engel-bad Hump-y-ting.”
A whole karaoke fever tekkin’ over de place, like everybody just suddenly discover dat dem coulda been big-time stars – if only de world did recognize dem “hidden talent.”
Now, some o’ dese ladies really believe dem voice sweeter than sugar cake. Dem does grab dat microphone an’ belt out tune like dem in Radio City Music Hall – but when dem voice start rassle up, is like de tune crawlin’ back inside! De way dem does pitch up de notes, it could resurrect de dead – not to mention give de livin’ a small heart attack. Last week, a woman in Kitty sing a song so off-key, a man duck and cover like he was dodging bullets.
And dem men! Boy, dem deh in a world all by demself. Got some ah dem who believe dem is Luciano Pavarotti reincarnate. You should see dem! Shirt button down halfway, chest hair puff out, eyebrows raise, an’ face twist up like dem ready to knock out a high note. Only problem is, when de note come out, it sound like a frog strugglin’ to swim out a bucket. But don’t tell dem dat – dem does think de crowd jumpin’ up ‘cause dem voice movin’ people, when really de crowd just shakin’ wid laughter.
But all fun aside, dem boys seh dat karaoke turn into de new pastime in Guyana. People not goin’ out fuh movies or concerts no more – everybody goin’ out fuh karaoke. Some does go fuh de “talent test,” trying to see if dem could mek a cut as de next big superstar. De rest, dem goin’ just to see if dey could survive de serenade widout bustin’ a laugh. It’s like a free comedy show where de punchline is always outta tune.
An’ lemme tell yuh, karaoke is no joke – people real serious. One man bring he own special mic, say he voice too “powerful” fuh de regular one. When he done, de only ting powerful was de silence dat follow!
Talk half. Leff half.
(Karaoke Konfusion)
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