Rishi, Rishi, Rishi – well not so fast Mister

Jul 22, 2022 Letters

Dear Editor,

Kaieteur News – We can cut that one out about London Bridge is falling down. It has fallen all the way down into the Indian Ocean after stopping first by the Ganges; now it is almost gone, save for another tremor or two. First, it was an emaciated half-naked man heavily armed with a walking stick that brought the mighty British Empire to a standstill, and actually made the sun settle over it. Get ready for possibly another round of that kind of history come September.

Now it is this bloke Sunak running full speed ahead and daring to have the ambition of taking over the whole show at Number 10 Downing. Cor blimey! Sir Winston must have swallowed his cigar, and choked on his swig of the spirits. I think Johnnie Walker Red gets the nod. The arch imperialist must be growling in this grave; Sunak who? I can only imagine the ghostly reactions of those other exemplary manifestations of John Bull, Rudyard Kipling and Lord Curzon.

A man with roots in the subcontinent now assumes this new version of the white man’s burden, almost at the doorstep of assuming of that mantle. History is known to repeat itself ever so often; this is a case of history reversing itself. To think that men would have been entertained in the Tower, as a prelude to losing their heads involuntarily for such ambitions is an indication of how far democracy has travelled in this blessed plot, this earth, this realm, this England.

The nerve of these people. First, they wanted freedom. Now they desire to run things, take over the whole show, and at the helm of the Conservative Party, of all groups. Is the Queen in on this? Will she partake of the festivities? Would she even condescend to receive the upstart new man? Perhaps, Rishi owes a debt of gratitude to American Meghan for breaking ceilings, kicking down doors, and trampling on sacred spaces. Now, this feller Rishi has to be the only man in memory who raised taxes and for his pains may get raised to Buckingham Palace to receive the blessings of his office (graciously on the part of the monarch, I hope), with neither snide remarks nor looking down at the nose of this uppity, ah, Brahmin (maybe?).

Heaven forbids that he turns out to be a Dalit in disguise. The English don’t have to fret themselves silly about reentry into Brexit anymore. They have a bigger worry: becoming an offshoot of the Bhartiya Janata Party. Five hundred years ago, that epitome of hostility, Henry VIII, got rid of the yoke of Rome. Now here is this chap coming to shake up Mayfair and St John’s Wood; it’s the Piccadilly Circus all over again.

England may never be the same again if he succeeds in convincing the grassroots in September of his fitness for this high office. It looks bleak at the commons level, with what I gently call old, settled ways.
Well, the era of Kohli is done and gone.

Now it is Rishi! Rishi! Rishi! No, it is not Kapoor, but Sunak. Move over Gavaskar and Tendulkar; talk about a legend before his time. And the whispers around town were that the Tories had it in for people deeper shades of pale. We shall see when the people look at what (and who) is before them, sit up straight and say: not so fast, buster. Not here. Ladbroke’s could go broke with those odds that it is pushing. Still, it would be a positive to improve the colour scheme at Number 10, and around Kensington gardens, too.

Sincerely,
GHK Lall

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