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Dem boys seh…Luncheon shock heself when he tell de truth

Dec 23, 2013 Dem Boys Seh, Features / Columnists, News

 

When a boy kiss a gyal fuh de first time he never forget. In fact, when people do things fuh de first time dem does end up in shock. That is wha happen to de Lunch Man. He tell de truth and when he realize that he actually talk de truth he tun round and get vex wid de Waterfalls paper fuh publishing de truth.
Dem boys seh that before he get vex wid de Waterfalls paper he get vex wid he mouth and he actually slap he own mouth.
Jagdeo did plan to slap he but he tell de man that he guh slap he own self. He seh that he too old fuh tek slap from li’l boys.
De truth of de story is that de crook, Jagdeo, did talk about mineral exploration in de area. He Cabinet colleagues was against he using de area in de first place but he bully dem.
When de reporters corner Luncheon, he couldn’t help but talk de truth. He didn’t bargain fuh Jagdeo getting vex when people expose he. Is now dem boys know that de Cabinet was not a democracy, that wha Jagdeo seh is de law and wha anybody else think don’t count.
That is why he get vex wid Luncheon. And poor Luncheon, after Jagdeo cuss he, decide to tek it out pun de Waterfalls paper. Dem boys seh that he new name is Dinner Man.
He claim how he write a letter to Uncle Adam. Uncle Adam ain’t see no letter. Dinner Man did not press de ‘send’ button.
He challenge de reportah to print word fuh word wha he seh. But de Big Market paper beat him to de punch. Dem print de thing even before he ask.
And dem boys ask de reportah fuh print wha Dinner Man seh, word fuh word—nah verbatim. That is a word dem nah understand. Only de shaat crook, Ash Knee, and de fat crook, Brazzy, know dem word that. In fact, dem nah only know word, dem know sentence and clause.
Dem boys plan fuh dress one of dem like Santa Claus and beat he down de road.
And as is Christmas, dem boys got a story. Dem remember when Brazzy guh to commit suicide last year.
Brazzy was sad because of de cuss he get fuh all dem project that he had to put in place.
Thinking that it would be best to get it over with quickly, he took out he pistol and decide to shoot heself in the heart.
Not wanting to miss the heart and become a vegetable he call Dinner Man to inquire as to just exactly where the heart would be.
“Your heart would be just below your left breast.”
He was admitted to the hospital with a gunshot wound to he knee.  As a fat man he breast sag.
Talk half and sorry fuh Dinner Man.

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