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Empathy and remorse are not the same thing – see for yourself
Dear Editor,
The MV Barima capsized. Adriana Younge. Mahdia Secondary School girls’ dormitory fire. Deadly 2023 GDF Bell 412 helicopter crash. Henry boys’ gruesome murders. Walter Rodney assassination. Satyadeow Sawh assassination. Vincent Teekah assassination. Courtney Crum-Ewing assassination. Ronald Waddell assassination. The 2002 to 2010 extrajudicial killings. The Rupununi Uprising of 1969. Femicide and the continued high incidence of domestic violence. Lusignan massacre. Bartica massacre. The 2002 Mash Day Camp Street jailbreak. The 2023 Mazaruni prison break. Son Chapman bombing. Enmore Martyrs. Mackenzie/Wismar Bridge massacre. Linden martyrs. Jonestown mass suicide. Eccles-Agricola and Two Brothers Gas Station siege. Election violence and rigging. GPF corruption and cover-ups. Excessive road fatalities and gruesome accidents involving private and public vehicles. Wanton reckless driving daily. Human rights and labour violations. Under-regulated public transportation. No or low quality social and public services in the hinterland. You are either part of the problem or part of the solution, there is no in-between.
Remorse is unmistakable pain, almost as if the tragedy happened to you, and with it a conviction to remedy, resolve, and live differently. Remorse ushers in perspective and a deep desire to be and do better. It brings an unmistakable sense of urgency to genuinely resolve, correct, and learn. It brings unwavering commitment to justice and excellence. It brings a resolve to ensure the tragedy never happens again, or that life is lived differently in honour of the pain, suffering, and loss. It deepens appreciation for life and lived experience. It is committed to never walking down that road again.
It does not politicize. It does not scapegoat. It does not turn a blind eye. It does not cover up. It does not deny. It feels, and it moves to correct.
Empathy consoles and comforts. Empathy can be taught and learned. It is a skill often applied in health care, social services, mourning, and consolation.
Remorse, you either feel it or you do not, and it is observable. Either way, consequences flow.
Those who have an ear, let them hear.
To the person reading this letter, pause for one minute after reading it. Sit in silence and ask yourself one question – how do you feel? Pay attention to what rises in your mind and to the different feelings and emotions that surface as you look inward. What matters here is not your feelings by themselves. What matters most is the process of consciously looking within.
To the people, families, communities, friends, and colleagues of those who lost their lives, and to those who survived and will carry these memories for the rest of their lives, I ask God to strengthen your courage, give you peace of mind, deepen your resolve, and renew your appreciation for life. I pray that you commit, in whatever ways and spaces you can, to doing your part to ensure that we do better and receive better, whether in your home, your workplace, your community or other spaces.
Sincerely,
Rawle A. Small
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