Latest update April 10th, 2026 12:30 AM
Apr 10, 2026 Dem Boys Seh, Features / Columnists
(Kaieteur News) – Dem boys seh the cash grant app ain’t really an app— is a crash gyant. And if yuh listen careful, you could hear it wheezing like an old minibus climbing dem hill pun de Soesdyke-Linden Highway with thirty passenger on board.
When government announce the app, everybody clap. Dem boys seh, “Look, we modern now! Next thing yuh know we gan get we monthly groceries delivered by drone. But two week later, the only thing flying is people temper.
De people tekkkin an eternity to register and collect dem G$100,000 in dem bank books. Dem boys seh at this rate, some people gon collect dem cash grant same time dem collecting pension.
And the app? Lord have mercy. People logging in, logging out, and logging frustration. Some stuck on “location” so long they start to search fuh exactly where dem does live. One man seh the app tell he to upload ID, and when he do that, the app behave like it see a jumbie—freeze up and disappear.
Another lady seh she was on hold so long she cook, eat, wash wares, take a nap, wake up—and still hearing, “Please wait…”
Dem boys seh the app ain’t facilitating nothing. Is like a bouncer at a party who ain’t letting nobody in, but also ain’t explaining why.
Now government seh plenty people getting paid through bank account. Dem boys seh that good—if yuh actually have a bank account. Because opening one in Guyana is like applying for citizenship in a foreign country. You need proof of address, two references, blood sample, and possibly yuh grandmother maiden name. In the end, what was supposed to be fast and fancy now looking slow and shaky. Dem boys seh is like buying a smartphone and using it as a paperweight. Government need fix de app quick. Because right now, the only thing the app distributing efficiently… is stress.
Talk half. Leff half.
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