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If yuh think people stupid…
Dem Boys Seh…
Kaieteur News- Dem boys seh one day a teacher tell de class, “Anybody who think dem stupid, stand up!”
Whole class sit down like if is prayer time.
De teacher seh, “Man, I sure some stupid people deh in here!”
Lil Johnny get up slow slow.
Teacher ask he, “Johnny, you think you stupid?”
Lil Johnny seh, “Nah sir… I just couldn’t bear fuh see you standing up by yuhself so long!”
But dem boys seh if yut think some people stupid, try de English language. Dem boys seh English is one language dat mek yuh head hurt more than a hangover.
First thing fuss: how eggplant ain’t got egg, hamburger ain’t got ham, and pineapple ain’t got pine or apple!
English muffin? Never see England yet. French fries? France seh, “Not we own!” Dem boys seh if it confusing, it got to be English.
Imagine dis: quicksand does wuk slow. Boxing ring square. Guinea pig? Nah from Guinea and definitely not a pig. Is like calling a duck a “water pigeon.”
Dem boys seh if writers does write, how come fingers nah fing? And if one tooth is teeth, then how come one booth and two beeth ain’t catching on?
Teacher does teach, but preacher ain’t praught. Like de language get tired halfway.
Vegetarian does eat vegetable. So a humanitarian? Dem boys seh keep dem far from de buffet. Yuh does recite at a play but play at a recital. Yuh does park on a driveway and drive on a parkway. And when de weather hot like hell one day, it could be cold like hell de next. Hell confused bad. House does burn down and burn up at de same time. And when yuh fill in a form, yuh got to fill it out. Bell only does ring when it done gone!
Dem boys seh English wasn’t build by computer. It build by people who ain’t had spell check or common sense. Dat is why when stars out, yuh does see dem… but when lights out, yuh can’t see nothing. And when yuh wind up a watch, it start, but when yuh wind up a story… it done.
Talk half. Leff half
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