De system does not wuk!

Jun 04, 2024 Dem Boys Seh, Features / Columnists

Kaieteur News – Each year we government does manage to siphon hundreds of billions of taxpayers’ dollars, only to produce… well, what exactly? A spectacular display of bureaucratic ineptitude, that’s what! It’s like watching a magic show where the rabbit never comes out of the hat, but you keep paying for the tickets anyway.

But don’t despair, for our leaders have devised a brilliant strategy to showcase their inefficiency: the Open Day! A day where hundreds, nay, thousands of frustrated souls line up to meet Ministers and public officials, clutching at the straws of hope that their little problems might finally get some attention. Imagine someone line up and wait fuh hours fuh see a Minister about a problem she has. When her turn finally comes around, she is told, “Your issue will be looked into.” She gat to wait another couple of months before the issue is finally resolved, if she is lucky.

The system does not work. The fact that someone has to see a Minister to resolve a problem is proof that the system does not work. The Open Day only confirms that it does not work.

Then there is another person waiting to get a house lot. He landlord done issue eviction order and he gat nowhere to live. He line up and wait his turn. Only to be told that all the house lots are already allocated but he will be put on the fast track when the next allotment comes through.

If the system was working, there would be no need for Open Days. But let’s give credit where it’s due. Our government has truly mastered the art of doing nothing with flair. Public service reform? Oh, that’s a good one! It’s been relegated to the bottom tier of the policy agenda, gathering dust. After all, who needs reform when the system is a perfectly oiled machine of dysfunction?

And let’s not forget the political appointees. Ah yes, the crown jewels in our bloated system. Many of these illustrious individuals are like decorative pieces, serving no real purpose but looking quite important while doing so. They lounge in their air-conditioned offices, drawing hefty salaries, and contributing precious little to the productivity of the nation. But hey, someone’s got to keep those chairs warm!

So, here’s a modest proposal for the President: maybe, just maybe, it’s time to trim the fat. Start by pruning these political ornaments and redirect those funds to, I don’t know, actual public service reforms? Radical idea, I know. But desperate times call for desperate measures. So, the next time you find yourself at an Open Day, marvel at the inefficiency, savor the irony, and remember – this is your government at work, or rather, at rest.

Talk half. Leff half.

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