FUNERALS ARE DIFFERENT THESE DAYS

Dec 16, 2016 Features / Columnists, Peeping Tom

Funerals are sad occasions. People are sad because they would have lost someone near and dear to them, someone they know they will never see again.
The grief can be overpowering. Sometimes, you are at a funeral and everyone is dry-eyed. But no sooner does someone begin to cry that the whole thing becomes contagious and tears begin to flow from even those who may have known the deceased casually.
Funerals, paradoxically, however can be happy occasions. When a relative dies, it is only then that the whole family usually comes together. The best place to catch up with relatives is usually at a funeral. Then is when almost all the family that you know comes out and you get to see them. This is why wake houses are places that people like to attend, because they can meet most of their relatives and catch up on what is happening. Funerals therefore can be a good occasion too.
But funerals and wakes are changing in Guyana. There used to be a time when people used to keep wakes from the moment the person died right through to when that person is buried. In those days, the servings at wake houses used to be black coffee and biscuits. These days, people are expecting more. They want fancy cutters and meals when they go to a wake.
This has led to some changes. Wakes are now costly events, since those hosting the wakes have to provide snacks and food for many, including a lot of persons who go to these wakes not to sympathize but to indulge in the food and drinks that are shared.
Some rich folks have decided that wakes are too costly. They cannot afford them. So what they do is to keep a wake the night before the funeral. In that way, they only have to provide food and snacks for one night. This is changing the traditional nature of wakes.
But not only wakes are changing, funerals are also changing. Just yesterday some persons were complaining that liquor is now being sold right outside the burial ground. The roads running alongside the burial grounds are being blocked because people park as they please. Funerals are becoming an inconvenience to motorists.
There used to be a time when if someone who was involved in criminal activities was being buried, even that person’s blood relatives were ashamed to go to the funeral. They were embarrassed to let people know that they were associated in any way – family or even friend or neighbour— with the dead criminal.
Things have changed dramatically on this front. Some of the largest funerals in this country are those involving persons who were killed during criminal activities. And it is not as if the majority of people go there out of curiosity. There are hundreds who go there because they feel important letting others know that they knew the criminal. This is how much this country has changed.
Imagine a criminal may have six or seven female partners and all of them are going to turn up and not just turn up, but turn up proudly to let the entire country know that they had a relationship with the dead criminal. Some of them even bring their children to let them see who their daddy was. Things have changed in Guyana.
What has also changed is the way people dress when attending funerals. The attire at funerals also leaves much to be desired. Some folks dress as if they are going to a party. You cannot really blame them that much though, because their wardrobes may be limited and they have to wear whatever they can put their hands on.
As you get older it is harder to attend funerals. Somehow you have that feeling that everyone is looking at you and saying, “He might be next.”

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