Auditor can’t recommend charges fuh ghost pensioners

Jun 10, 2016 Dem Boys Seh, Features / Columnists, News

These audit reports bringing out de unthinkable, de indefensible, de unimaginable, unacceptable and most times de ting is unbelievable.
If dem boys was part of de previous administration or dem had relatives who was part of de people who do de unbelievable, dem boys woulda disown dem or poison dem.
Dem boys ain’t telling you-all to poison nobody; dem just talking wha dem woulda do.
These people so unbelievable that dem buy pumps fuh dem MP to use and record in de books how dem buy fertilizer.
Shake Bax collect taxi money fuh travel in Trinidad and he never go pun de plane. Rob de Earth claim how he build 27 bridges in Parika and Den Amstel back dams and Guyanese people can’t find one to date.
Well dem boys seh 27 got to be de PPP lucky number, because Minister Jenny Webster use to pay 27 jumbies. It had to be in de night, because de entire Staff at de Ministry never see dem and de people at de post office never find dem.
According to dem boys dem had to get pay at de Ghost Office.
Dem use to go in dress in all over white to collect dem pension money. Dem believe that dem ghost pensioners had to go to collect de money by numbers. “Ghost Number One” and so on.
Dem boys want to believe that Jenny run to Canada last month because she is Ghost Number 28.
Then you got de other one. He daady, Donald Dumb seh he is a bright boy, brighter than a bulb. Dem boys ain’t certain if he was talking bout a five, 50 or 100-watt bulb.
Wha dem auditors talk about prove that he no brighter than a five-watt bulb. According to de auditor he run de e-governance project, and there is no record to show how he spend, wha he buy, wha he do, who he buy from. In short he had a ghost recording system.
Jagdeo create de ghost system and everybody follow him. Now you can’t find Rob de Earth or de bridge he build. Soon you mightn’t Jagdeo, de Rat.
Dem boys know Dale, de reporter who dead last week, will check pun dem top side, and report back. He already checking pun Jagdeo.
Talk half and mek sure you don’t holler out in yuh sleep when yuh dream dem.

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