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De excuse factory working overtime

Jan 17, 2025 Dem Boys Seh, Features / Columnists

Dem Boys Seh…

Kaieteur News- Dem boys hear de Opposition busy preparing fuh elections. But nah fuh win, yuh know. Dem preparing deir excuse when dem lose! De excuse factory working overtime, and de workers getting time and a half plus a bonus if de lie sound believable.

First ting dem seh is dat GECOM got a bloated list.

De list can’t be bloated when the law allow fuh people pun de list even if dem living in America and Canada. If we tek off all dem people nuff of dem opposition suporters who living overseas can be disenfranchised. How yuh can get people off the list who entitled to be on the list?

Then dem want fingerprint technology. Is wha next, retina scan? DNA sample? De whole population gon have to carry a birth certificate, passport, and affidavit just fuh vote? Dem seh house-to-house verification important. But dem boys want to know: who gon pay fuh all dat walking? Dem tink GECOM is de Post Office?

Yuh see, dem boys figure out de game. De Opposition setting up fuh blame everybody but demself. If GECOM do everything dem ask for and dem still lose, dem gon seh, “It was a conspiracy!” If de rain fall on elections day, dem gon seh, “De weather rig against we!”

De real joke is how dem acting like dis plan smart. But dem boys seh it stupid bad. When yuh lose election one time, people does forgive yuh. Dem does seh, “Try again next time.” When yuh lose two time, yuh supporters does start fuh grumble and seh, “Wha really going on hay?” But when yuh lose three time, yuh best pack yuh bags and go plant pumpkin, because people done wid yuh.

So de Opposition come up wid de grand master plan: blame de system. Is like de man who lose he cricket match and seh de pitch was crooked. Or de fella who lose he domino game and seh de other man using trick bones. De whole ting sounding desperate, like a man trying fuh convince he wife dat lipstick on he collar is tomato ketchup.

Dem boys seh elections is like playing de lottery. Yuh cyan win if yuh nah buy de right ticket. De Opposition ticket full ah blame, full ah excuse, and full ah drama. But it empty when it come to ideas fuh de people.

So when dem lose again, dem boys gon sit back wid a cold drink and wait fuh hear de next round of blame. Maybe dem gon blame de ants in de polling station or de sun fuh being too hot. But one ting sure: de excuses gon keep flowing.

Talk half. Leff half

(De excuse factory working overtime)

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