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Thrill tourism!

Mar 17, 2024 Dem Boys Seh, Features / Columnists, News

Kaieteur News – In Guyana we will soon have a situation where we will have more hotel rooms that de population itself. It is a classic case of “build it and they will come,” except in this scenario, “they” are still debating whether Guyana is a real place or just a fictional setting in a low-budget spy thriller.

Yes, it’s true, we’ve been feverishly constructing hotels faster than a toddler can scatter Lego bricks across the living room floor. Because clearly, what we lack in actual tourists, we can make up for in empty rooms and dusty minibars. It’s the perfect plan, really—like throwing a party and forgetting to invite anyone.

But fear not because our great leaders have assured us that this influx of hotels will solve all our problems. Who needs functioning infrastructure or a semblance of public safety when you can have a five-star hotel with a view of the garbage-strewn streets and the occasional car chase?

And let’s not forget the joy of paying exorbitant prices for the privilege of staying in the said hotels. Why, it’s practically a steal when you consider the added bonus of risking life and limb every time you step outside to explore the charming chaos of our disordered city. You also paying premium prices for an economy ticket. And if you desire to see Kaieteur Falls be prepared to pay another hefty fee. Tourism in Guyana is high-priced.

But that is not all! For the adventurous souls among us, there’s always the thrill of using our roads, where reckless driving isn’t just a hobby—it’s practically an Olympic sport. And as for crime, well, let’s just say our muggers have a certain entrepreneurial spirit that really adds a dash of excitement to the tourist experience.

So yes, before we embark on this grand tourism drive, perhaps it’s worth considering a few minor details—like fixing the country. Call us crazy, but maybe, just maybe, tourists might prefer clean streets, safe neighborhoods, and reasonably priced accommodations over the thrill of trucks on our roads and being mugged by the bandits

But hey, who needs common sense when you’ve got a surplus of hotel rooms and a deficit of sanity? Here’s to Guyana: where the only thing more abundant than hotel rooms is irony.

Talk Half! Leff Half!

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