Preparing the mind for success, whose job is it?

Sep 25, 2022 News

==The Creators’ Coven==

By Zena Henry

Kaieteur News – Have you ever noticed how efficient you become, when there is a strong desire for something? It’s absolutely incredible how we conjure up the will and energy to manifest the things we want the most. Yet, it is equally amusing how we fail to enact the same discipline and energy toward that need or desire that for instance, may not bring us any immediate rewards.

We often find ourselves, as we honestly should, living for the now; we seek enjoyment and fulfillment now, thus expending our time and energies now, to attain such results. I mean everyone should be happy in every moment, doing what pleases them the most, but in this existence, where our level of comfort comes, more or less from the effort we put in, living for now is not always the most beneficial option.

Many of us, depending on our upbringing, may never have had certain qualities instilled in us. And I am not talking about the basics; don’t tell lies, do not steal, be respectful, etcetera, etcetera. I am talking about the personal qualities that help to build successful characters. If you were brought up ‘ole skool’ style, in a working-class home, like me, it’s highly likely that emphasis was placed on you growing up to be a respectful individual more than a successful one. Now there is nothing wrong with being a respectful character, but I say this to highlight the difference and importance between being taught about success along with anything else that is also deemed necessary. I for sure was not taught to be successful. I was taught everything else in the average home, but I was never taught that success was a quest. Truth be told, the only discussion on success in our home was to go to school and get an education. To this day, we say education brings success, when in fact, education alone doesn’t do the job. For sure, being employed is not a representation of being successful, especially if it is not one that satisfies you or does not bring in the income you desire.

Success now looks very different to me, I no longer hold it to financial bounds, although, I must say that financial security is often the gateway to true success. Of course, if your basic needs are taken care of and there is no worry about survival issues, then that leaves much space to explore and chase dreams.

So, we will focus on financial success and see what this entails. I say sometimes, there are things I know now that I wish someone would have told me at a younger age, because now that I know the journey, I recognise the amount of work that I have to put in, and I am still working on myself, trying to put things in place and create the mindset conducive for my success. No one told me success is an attitude, that it is a behaviour; that it is not a look, but a style; that it is courage, discipline and that it is hard work. It is the ability, in a lot of cases, to ignore the enjoyments of the now for the glory of later.

I personally do not desire too much. Actually, what I desire the most, at this point in my life, is ready to be harnessed, I just lack the courage so far, to drop everything and chase after it. Sometimes, it’s the discipline too, to try to maintain a balance, and incorporate it into my current activities; despite me being convinced that it will bring me great joy and fulfillment. I think I have identified fear as my greatest hurdle right now; fear of not achieving what I envision and fear of probably putting myself out there. Now these are my thoughts in my 30s. When I was younger, I felt like there was no fear that could have held me back; I was eager; I was hungry to be what I wanted to be, but that eagerness was not fed. Can you imagine what could have happened if my drive and excitement was fed at an early age? There are parents who nurture and encourage their children to be the things that they desire, and they bring them up in a way that facilitates that. I have seen the difference in homes where kids are taught to be successful characters, against those that teach the basics of just being a good person or any other ‘people person’ skills.

For example, in some homes, when children turn 18, their parents tell them you are an adult now. The new young adult believes that; goes into the world of work, “falls in love”, gets a boyfriend or girlfriend, gets a child, in many cases, and immediately life begins for them, leaving little room for personal growth or achievement or even space to clear the air on what path it is they should be taking based on the life they want to create for themselves. Outside of this, we get caught up in other activities and distractions that don’t necessarily serve our development; and it eventually weighs more on our lives than the things that actually should.

On the other hand, I have seen parents tell their 18-year-olds that they are not an adult, and that the work to get there has just begun; that they must now go to university, or learn a skill, or learn a trade and become a contributing adult rather than a dependent one. I’ve heard parents say to their kids that age does not make you grown; that there are grown folks’ problems and needs and until you can fulfill those things for yourself, then you may consider yourself mature. Of course, I have seen some of those school friends turn out to be very successful people, never mind much of it came from the contributions of their guardians.

Responsible adults are able to provide for themselves nonetheless and for their families, as well as make positive contributions to their societies. We can ask ourselves how such discussions may have been held in homes and how many were let in on the secret; that preparing one’s self for success is an entire job; as well as, how many of us were prepared for it. Based on where some of us came from, we may recall that such conversations were almost non-existent.

The bottom line therefore, is that instilling certain qualities in a person, especially at a young age, has immense benefits when talking about success. Disciplined, being responsible, persistent, motivated, enduring; all these qualities and learnt behaviours that weren’t driven into us, yep, you guessed it, we need them all. And what we did not receive earlier in our lives, if you are looking to be successful then I do suggest that you do like me and start putting in the work. We must clear out the useless information, beliefs and ideas that we hold and make room for those that will serve in your purpose and take you almost effortlessly to your final destination. And there are many ways to prepare yourself. You couldn’t ask for a better time to be here, when everything has been made easier with the easy access to information.

I have had conversations with my peers and some have reasoned that indeed if our parents had taught them some things they know now, they honestly believe that they would have been further along in life. But it has been stated too that if our guardians themselves did not understand some of these very factors, how then could they have imparted it to us and prepare us for the level of success that we seek. We must therefore do it ourselves and share it for the elevation of the generations, if we are looking that far beyond. Hopefully, some of us who were not honoured to certain life changing knowledge would eventually pick up on what was missed out as we get older and seek to achieve with that which we learn. And we understand that value of certain information and lessons, and deliver it to the ones behind us. As they say, we all have to be the change that we would like to see.