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We have to elevate the way we speak and interact with each other
DEAR EDITOR,
I am writing this letter with great sentiments regarding Justice Cecil Kennard, a retired judge, appointed to head a Commission of Inquiry– an inquiry which was set up to investigate the operation of the Georgetown Mayor and City Council.
I carefully looked at the video, more than once, which was circulated via the media. I was saddened and dismayed at the tone and language the esteemed Justice used toward Mayor Patricia Chase-Green, in what he may considered his effort to preside over the inquiry. As the head of the inquiry, no doubt it is his show, and his right to determine code of conduct, including questioning and how those who appear before him conduct and present themselves and the evidence they lead. At the same time such latitude and authority are not without expectation, on the part of the Justice, of some graciousness in speaking with people.
As Guyanese we know it is less than courteous, or some may say rude, to tell people to “shut up.” It does not form part of respectful interaction, politeness or show of respectful authority. Children are usually told to “shut up” and some adults even find this admonition a tad crude/rude, preferring instead to ask that they “be quiet,” as society is evolving to accept that children too should be treated with civility.
I am sure the esteemed Justice, while in Tuesday’s Kaieteur News said he does not regret his comment, would not desire anyone to speak to him in like manner should it be felt he is acting inappropriately.
As a woman the “shut up” admonition resonated in an offensive manner, and I’m sure I speak for many women here. Women have had to fight for the right to vote, to be educated, to marry and have children and be allowed to work, to enter the legislature, to be in government as leaders not only secretaries and administrative staff, etc. It has been centuries of fight to speak out and not shut up, to prove our worth and demand our respect as equals.
For years, women have been told to “shut up” in so many ways, resulting in acts of abuse – mental, physical, social, sexual, economic, political and everything possible where it is seen as a man’s world to dictate, determine for her.
This form of abuse happens in some religions where women are only allowed to go so far in the leadership, then after having to “shut up.” In the corporate world doors are closed to women’s advancement because it is felt that they are not so worthy, and when present should be seen and not heard, i.e. they must “shut up.”
It happens in the boardrooms, at meetings, etc. where women are ‘patiently’ listened to and their views ‘politely’ discarded or they have to work doubly harder than men to prove themselves as worthy of attention and their input as valued. Some have even felt acquiring such respect necessitates another form of abuse, i.e. sexual. In homes where our mates think of us as inferior and not equal many know what “shut up” means.
It is the flashing red warning sign that if they dare speak after being told to “shut up,” the physical and emotional abuse that will reign down will be brutal.
Retired Justice Kennard may be old schooled and find the “shut up” language inoffensive, but we can change society for the better when we are mindful and respecting of the feelings of others.
I am equally confident, given his years of experience on the bench and reservoir of words in his brain, he would not have found it impossible to find a more befitting choice to make his point and/or direct and dictate the functioning of his commission. It is my hope the esteemed Justice understands how important is language and also how painful it can be when not properly used.
As Guyanese, we are “One People, One Nation, One Destiny,” and we have to elevate the way we speak and interact with each other. The higher on the social rung, the greater are the expectations and burden to be civil with others.
Respectfully yours,
B. Beniprashad Rayman
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