Let’s all reach out to our friends and family members

Nov 29, 2015 Features / Columnists, My Column

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Suicide is now the talk of Guyana, and not because the country made the news as the suicide capital of the world. Rather, it is because we now have young people choosing innovative ways to kill themselves. Indeed, a lot of people choose ways that are commonplace. They use poison, the rope and very few use a gun.
Now we have people going to the top of the Kaieteur Falls to jump to their death. The first time it happened the newspapers had a field day reporting on every aspect, from the jump to the retrieval. Then there was a second jumper. Again the media followed the event, but not as detailed as the first one.
Again there was a lot of interest in the recovery, but that soon faded until the third jumper. As was the case of the first two, this was also a young woman. Then someone made an interesting connection; the victims were young Hindu women.
All of them suffered from depression, although we did not take it for anything because in this country we do not diagnose depression. We see a person in a state of depression and we say that he or she is just moody.
We see someone crying and we either joke or we say that something must be wrong. We do not attempt to offer help because we are a people who tend to leave people in distress to themselves, because we conclude that they need privacy.
But in recent times I have been talking to people who now say that they have been to the depths of depression and something prevented them from jumping off the edge. In one case the victim had experienced a break-up. However, there was still some reasoning and the person recovered.
Recently, news came that a person attached to an aircraft company killed himself. My first thought was that he had so much going for him, so why did he? It was not until I spoke with Ms Annette Arjoon-Martins that I realized the person found each day extremely painful to go on living.
That is a concept that I cannot imagine. I, too, have been depressed, but I always told myself that tomorrow would be better and that any pain would ease as days go by. But I am told that many people do not have such a coping mechanism. That is why I am now thinking about setting up a group that would deal with people who suffer from depression.
Psychiatrists are crucial here, but Guyana has a psychiatrist to patient ratio of probably one to 5,000. This alone is mindboggling, so there is need for support groups. We should all begin to talk more to those close to us, because each depressed person gives a sign. If we get them talking then we could begin to help that person get out of the feeling.
When the individual made the connection between Kaieteur Falls jumpers and Hinduism, I began to wonder at the role of the church. Some of them attribute depression to the presence of a demon and they adopt drastic measures to drive out this demon. They only make matters worse.
Some years ago, one of my cousins jumped through a window to his death in Beterverwagting because of a beating he was getting to rid him of the demon. Mother Patricia Alves killed a woman by beating her to rid her of a demon too. Alves ended up in jail; many do not because the beating death is not reported.
In other cases, there is the so-called laying of hands. A pastor surrounded by worshippers would scream prayers over the individual with the hope that the demon would leave, not recognizing that the demon is depression or some other mental ailment.
When I visited the United States recently, I discovered that every home had a veritable dispensary. There were tablets and pills for just about everything. Everyone seemed to have a problem that needed medical intervention. I suppose that because some people had more money than most of us do, they also saw to it that their relatives and family members go to the “shrink”.
I later learned that tablets and pills have side effects that cause problems that require even more pills and tablets to treat. In Guyana we are not so hypochondriac. But that does not mean that we should not begin to pay attention to people close to us.
A simple “see you later” before we leave home can go a long way. In the workplace a person who is withdrawn may actually be reaching for help, but we turn away when the person mumbles, “I am okay. I just want to be left alone.”
Some women suffer postpartum depression—a feeling that descends on the person following the birth of a child. We husbands just conclude that she is moody. Then the woman kills her baby and we scream in panic.
This most recent jumper may never be recovered because for one, the descent to where she is, is perilous. The last time it took some highly trained soldiers fourteen days to retrieve a body. The cost was said to be in excess of $10 million.
Sadly for the family members, there will never be closure, because they may not get a chance to bury or to cremate their loved one.
To crown it all, the young woman recalled that her boyfriend committed suicide some six years ago. She blamed herself and chose to end her life on the anniversary of his death. Her relatives were unaware, they said. The need for support groups becomes more urgent.

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