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Bharrat Lie-Nell Jagdeo is back

Apr 08, 2015 Dem Boys Seh, Features / Columnists, News

De only thing dem boys nah know is when dem gun dead, and if dem try hard dem gun know. When dem tell people that not every sentence, but every word that come out of Jagdeo mouth is a lie, plenty people believe, but some people cuss dem boys. Even de Chat-3 cuss dem. Donald too seh that dem boys get personal wid Jagdeo because dem don’t like him.
Well yesterday, de whole nation see, hear and even smell fuh demself. Two weeks ago, Jagdeo stand up and tell de nation that he ain’t deh pun no list, that he ain’t interested in public office.
When Donald hand in de list yesterday dem boys want to know if Donald does do voodoo. Dem see Bharrat Jagdeo pun de list, but did not know was this scamp, because his middle name –Lie-Nell— wasn’t there. It had to be that he, Lie-Nell, obeah Donald.
Now dem boys know that when Jagdeo seh that he didn’t want a third term, he was lying through he teeth. He playing Russian roulette wid de country.
Dem boys hear that he gun mek Harper step down as Prime Minister and he gun step in, just like when Janet did step aside and let de li’l boy pass. That is how he tun president.
He tell de nation that he gun go personally to fix that Jhan Jaat wha he give Guyana— de Skeldon factory— wid he own hands. He never go to see de factory.
He tell de nation that he spend US$200 million; dem boys know that is a lie, that he mek a hustle.  De NIS $69M flat building wha really cost $10 million, he promise to investigate. He never send nobody. He even cuss Luncheon fuh releasing de contract.
He lie bout de airport; he lie bout duty free concession; he lie bout Bai Shan Lin; he lie bout Vitarna; he lie bout de Specialty Hospital; he lie bout de Sun and Sand hotel wha disappear from de earth. He lie bout everything under de sun.
He lie bout de low carbon strategy which he seh was he baby. That thing did belong to Cheddi and Navin—all two of dem gone to de Great Beyond.
He lie bout fighting against corruption. He lie bout early Local Government Elections. He lie bout Public Procurement Commission.
He lie so much that he lie and seh that a close female family dead. Dem had a big wake. De funeral day dem was carrying out de coffin from de house when dem bounce a wall going through de door.
De lady was only in a coma and he did know; suh when dem bounce de wall she wake up and start fuh kick up in de coffin. She live fuh another ten years.
When she dead de other day and dem carrying she through de same door, he holler, “You-all be careful by that doorway. De last time she wake up.”
Talk half and look out fuh Bharrat Lie-Nell Jagdeo.

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