From the Diaspora...LIFE DOES HAVE AN EXPIRY DATE FOLKS

From the Diaspora…LIFE DOES HAVE AN EXPIRY DATE FOLKS

Oct 19, 2014 News

By Ralph Seeram
“She has not talked to me for a year” the email said, to which I replied that the individual needs to grow up and realize “life has an expiry date”
I am sure many of you readers have gone through phases of life where someone is not talking to you or vice versa, relatives are not talking to each other, there is division in families where sometimes a brother is not talking to a sister and children are not speaking to their parents.
If one examines the reasons for the disagreements, and that is really what it’s all about, one would find it is for very stupid, if not silly reasons.
To give you an idea of the silly reasons people stop talking to each other; a relative died and was being buried the same weekend that another relative was getting married. One decided to go to the funeral while the other decided to go to the out of state wedding. It was a difficult choice, so each made their own choice. The one sister who went to the funeral disagreed with the other who went to the wedding and stopped talking to her.
Now tell me, it that a reason to stop talking to someone?
I think when you get down to the root of these disagreements, it is a case where one wants to impose their will on or control the actions of the other person. Some people tend to be very controlling and if you do not give in to their behavior, you become ‘the enemy’. Hence “I am not talking to you”
“Speech that heals is like a live giving tree, but a perverse tongue breaks the spirit” Proverbs 15.4.
Unlike the groceries on the shelves of the supermarket which states the expiry date, we humans do not know our expiry date, yet we go on in life carrying grudges, some to their graves.
I have attended funerals where the relatives of the deceased were not talking to the deceased in life but crying hysterically over the dead body, venting their regrets as if the deceased could hear. I am sure many of you readers have experienced this.
“The lips of the wise spread knowledge, but not so the heart of fools” Proverb 15:7
The festive season is upon us, it is the season of goodwill. I mentioned in a previous article how Guyanese on Christmas Day reach out to their neighbors to express season’s greetings, sometimes inviting them over for a “drink”.
Neighbours who they may not have spoken to for the entire year. Why should we wait until Christmas to extend goodwill.
Some people carry grudges for decades, I recall some years ago on a trip to Guyana I was asked to deliver some money to the father of a cousin of mine. On my return to the US I was confronted by the ex wife who was very annoyed that the daughter had sent money for her father, telling me all the faults of the father, but here is the sad part; she had been divorced from him for some forty years! Yes folks, 40 yrs she has been carrying a grudge.
In response I told her that she needed to free herself of her hatred as it is like a cancer eating away at her heart.
“A joyful heart makes the face cheerful, but by a painful heart the sprit is broken” Proverbs 15:13
For us who are Christians we recite our prayers asking God to “forgive our sins, AS WE FORGIVE OTHERS” Some of us forget the latter part, we delude ourselves that it does not apply to us but to someone else.
This week I was drawn to a post on Facebook which partly prompted me to write this article, it spoke about five simple rules to be happy, (I) Free your heart from hatred- FORGIVE, (2) Free your mind from worries- give more of you, (3) Live simply, appreciate what you have, (4) Give more. (5) Expect less from people but give more of your selves.
This week my 4 year- old grandson was showing me on his iPad, (yes he has his own Ipad, welcome to the new digital generation) the story of the Lion and the Mouse, which he pulled up on YouTube. It’s a parable that was explained to me in my primary school days, and I was surprised the story is still being told. He wanted to know why the Mouse came to the rescue of the Lion, eating away at the nets to free him. So I had to explain the moral of the story about not making enemies and the need to forgive, as your enemy can be your friend in your time of need and distress as the Lion found out in the story.
Some 100 persons lost their lives in road fatalities in Guyana so far this year. I am sure the adults killed never thought they would not see Christmas this year. We sometimes tend to think the uncertainty of life is for the other person; that it does not apply to us, until it “hits” close to home.
Today more than ever communication is at our finger tips, be it phone or social media. So as the Christmas season descends on us folks go ahead and make the call to that person you stopped talking to. If you do not want to talk on the phone, send an email to break the ice, and take it from there. If the other party does not respond to overtures then your conscience is clear that you did your part.
“The fear of the lord provides wise instruction, and before honor comes HUMILITY.” Proverbs 15.33