Domestic violence is a woman’s unending nightmare

Dec 03, 2010 Letters

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Dear Editor,
From biblical days to this modern age as her struggles continue to survive in a world stranglehold by evil, man being the tool used to trample on her worth, her values.
The sound of her cries is heard in every corner of this earth, the pain and anguish of violation, of abuse, her mind tortured and scarred has found no real compassion and regrets, but continued betrayal by the one who was suppose to love, care and protect her and her blood continues to stain this sinful earth. Will it ever nd?  God’s words as woman rose from the dust, a being of beauty, charm and sensuality, that man will be the head of the home and she his companion, to serve him, to love him as he holds her protectively in his strong arms, has certainly being taken out of context. It did not mean that she was to be his ultimate servant or slave, whilst he unfeelingly uses and abuses her.
Her creation to be his companion was to love and share as they become one, but man with his physical strength, his aggression and stone-cold determination has destroyed the true meaning of those blessed words, drowned in the raging seas and has placed himself on a pedestal powered by his self-proclaimed superiority, as rampant violence manifests itself against women, like a monster that refuses to die.
Women possess not the physical strength, the aggression nor the coldness to counter act the danger, so her softness, her compassion, her forgiving heart is beaten down, blow upon blow as the need for power and control over the weaker sex consumes man, so much so, that it seems as though, that need as woman is battered, raped, insulted and degraded, fuel that strength and give him that great feeling of superiority.   It is said by the fair-minded male, that, “a man can only feel his strength against a woman.” And everyday of an abused woman’s life is testimony of that statement.  Time has seen women’s fight for rights, for recognition as groups and organisations across the globe  advocate for man’s understanding and support for an end to this madness that is easily destroying life and this world, but the arrows shot at that monster is not very effective, so strong is evil.
What weapon can be used to rid the world of this seemingly, undead, monstrosity of violence against women? There are many factors that leads to these sad, horrific episodes in a woman’s life and in some societies she is blamed and admonish for the unending abuse and deaths, that maybe she should have walked, that she should not have gone back, that she should have retaliated.
But, it’s easier to issue statements, to make accusations or pass judgment than to really understand what goes on in a woman’s mind, her thoughts, and her feelings.
No-one can feel that bleeding in her heart, but herself and when comforting, supportive words and helpful hands cannot reach her to help with the healing process, only death takes away the pain.
A woman hardly ever retaliates against physical abuse because she is not violent by nature and because she feels intimidated by man’s strength, a fear that makes her weaker in body, but in mind she stays strong to fight to survive for another day. Women who forgive and go back to abusive partners, do so because of the pressure of family, religion and culture, the children factor, being uneducated, the insecurity of being alone in a world dominated by man, so she lives with the hope change will come.
Sometimes it does, sometimes it doesn’t and the wicked glint of a knife or cruelty of heavy fists kill the hope with her. There are, on the other hand, women who couldn’t take the abuse anymore and they bravely take chances to break out, without family support, no financial security or proper education and managed to survive, even if it meant selling their bodies to do so.
But, there are millions in the world who are still shackled by society and traditional culture as the violence persists and she continues to suffer, to die, for not every man can control the beast that lives within him and,  yet, for it all, she cannot hate him or see him suffer and with her dying breath she would forgive him for that’s the way she was made.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                One day, though, she will be free  of the pains, the abuses, the injustices as the future generation rises with strength of mind and tools of power to break the shackles of man’s power and control, and the wrongs of traditional culture and the monster of violence against woman will fall, never to rise again.
A new day will dawn.
Maureen Singh

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