TOWARDS THE ELIMINATION OF VIOLENCE AGAINST WOMEN

Nov 21, 2010 AFC Column, Features / Columnists

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By Pastor Sewnauth Punalall MBS (Hon)
AFC Executive Member

On Thursday, November 25, 2010 Guyana will once again join the world in observing International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women. Across Guyana our precious women and girls continue to be battered by abusers although many write and/or speak out against this evil.
The AFC sees our women and girls as an important and integral part of our population which should be treasured and appreciated and we will continue to take a firm stand against any form of domestic violence against them.
Domestic violence occurs when a family member uses violent and/or abusive behaviour to control another family member or members. Legally, domestic violence is defined as any incident of threatening behaviour, violence or abuse (psychological, physical, sexual, financial, or emotional) between adults who are or have been intimate partners or family members, regardless of gender or sexuality.
Our women and girls need to be familiar with the traits of a potential abuser and stay away from such persons once they demonstrate any of these traits in their deportment.
There is firstly the trait of jealousy. Jealousy has nothing to do with love. It is a sign of insecurity and possessiveness on the part of the abuser.
An abuser will question you about whom you talk to, accuse you of unfaithfulness, or jealous of the time you spent with your family and friends. There is secondly the trait of controlling behaviour. Under the pretence for your safety, your need to use your time wisely, or your need to make good decisions, an abuser will seek to control you. As this behaviour worsens the abuser will require you to seek permission for the least of things.
There is thirdly the trait of isolation. The abuser will try to cut you off from everything and from everyone who can offer you support. There is fourthly the trait of hypersensitivity. The abuser is easily insulted, or takes the slightest setbacks as personal attacks.
Women and girls, for the sake of the peace of your souls and the safety of your bodies, do not enter into or continue in a relationship with persons displaying these destructive traits.
Perpetrators of domestic violence against girls and women do not value their presence or their outstanding contribution to society.
Our women are the ones who bring forth children through labour pains. They are the ones who with very meagre resources often single-handedly parent children. They are our homemakers.
Most of our school teachers, postal workers, nurses and salespersons are women, just to name a few. With much boldness and valour they dedicatedly and sacrificially serve in our security and military services. No wonder Jesus Christ used them as an example of hard work in Mt 24:41 where He referred to two women “grinding at the mill”.
Rather than making them victims of violence we should unitedly support them as they work so hard for a better standard of living and a better Guyana.
Although many of us recognize the valued contribution of our women to our country’s economy there is a certain aspect of their economic contribution, which is often overlooked, especially by those who ill-treat them. I refer to the volume of work a woman pushes in her home from dawn to dusk.
A speaker at the Motherhood Initiative for Research and Community Involvement (MIRCI) in Toronto reminded her audience recently that the English word “economics” is rooted in the Greek which carries the idea of “managing a household”. Women who serve full time in their homes do not have their names recorded in any payroll. They do not have such fringes as annual leave or holiday with pay coming to them. They are not visible as workers, and they are not visible in the distribution of benefits.
However we can never quantify in dollars their contribution. Countless tasks usually fall on mothers, most of which is unpaid work. As the old maxim goes – a woman’s work is never done.
Marilyn Waring, political economist and a former New Zealand cabinet minister said “The market wouldn’t survive if it wasn’t for the backbone of unpaid work”. Waring calculates that unpaid work is the largest sector of any economy. And, all around the world, most of that work is performed by women.
On Sept 27, 2010 Nicolas D. Kristof (prize winning columnist for the New York Times) said to an audience at the Harvard Medical School “Women are more likely to invest money or assets in their children or small business, and men are more likely to spend on instant gratification, like alcohol, cigarettes, and prostitution”.
During the 2005 floods, whilst paddling in a boat distributing relief supplies, one of our saddest encounters was with a pregnant woman wading through waist deep water to get cigarettes for her abusive husband.
When our women suffer at the hands of abusers it is therefore not only a pressure to our already overtaxed health care and justice systems but also a blow to the economy of our country.
Cognizant of these ramifications, the AFC will work harder in the areas of shelter, transitional housing, court advocacy, referrals, and comprehensive counseling programmes for victims of domestic violence.
To our women and girls who are victims of domestic violence we offer you these encouraging words of Eleanor Roosevelt “You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you look fear in the face… You must do the thing you think you cannot do”.

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