THE SEASON OF MADNESS

Sep 16, 2010 Features / Columnists, Peeping Tom

Are we ever going to have one day—just one day— when we can pick up the newspapers and not read about a human tragedy? It seems hardly a day goes by without some brutal attack.
Yet another such attack took place a few days ago when a mother was fatally stabbed by her reputed husband.
According to reports, the stabbing incident stemmed from years of abuse that the woman suffered at the hands of her partner and followed soon after she received a phone call from someone who she said was her supervisor but who her partner felt was from someone competing with him for her affections.
She left her home but was allegedly pursued by her reputed husband who stabbed her repeatedly, causing her death.
A brief survey of the domestic violence deaths in Guyana of recent would show that many of the women who have been murdered, died as a result of crimes of passion from their partners triggered either by rejection or by jealousy.
Like suicide, domestic violence is now a major social problem. And it has become a major problem because increasingly the social bonds between persons who live in neighbourhoods are being weakened.
There is a violent quarrel next door and instead of the neighbour intervening, he or she decides to ‘mind his own business”.
Sometimes when the neighbour interjects in the quarrel, the neighbour suffers also and is accused of meddling in something that does not concern him or her. And so the neighbour does not get involved even though he or she knows that a tragic outcome can result from what is taking place.
People are living private lives these days. They are keeping to themselves and not interacting with other members in their community. Elders are no longer shown any regard.
In fact some of these elders are annoyed when they are described as elders. Old people are looked down upon and therefore when they speak to the hot-headed, they are ignored.
This means that increasingly persons are being disconnected from certain traditional institutions within their communities that resolve conflict. The older uncle, the aunt, the grandparents, the village elders no longer carry the respect that they used to enjoy in the past.
Women today are less inclined also to accept abusive relations. They are empowering themselves to move on and end certain relationships. But some men are not prepared to allow these women their freedom and this is part of the problem that has led to the sickening levels of domestic violence. Jealously and rejection take their toll and the men react with violence.
A great deal of the focus of domestic violence has been on the victim, which in many instances are women. But perhaps, those who commit the violence need just as much help. And sadly this help is almost totally absent within villages. For example, there are not many social workers and counselors assigned to villages.
Therefore, when the police receive reports about domestic violence, there is nowhere within their precincts that they can refer the persons concerned for counseling assistance.
This is not to blame the authorities for individual cases of violence. But it is necessary that we study what is taking place and seek to put things in place to reduce this terrible incidence of domestic violence.
The young lady who was stabbed to death a few a days ago had four young children. These children now have to grow up without a mother’s love, something that is irreplaceable. These children are not going to have it easy.
It is all part of this silly season of madness because persons have not learnt to control our passions or, manage anger and jealousy. Perhaps this is where we should start by helping our citizens to deal with the situations that give rise to anger and hurt so that instead of channeling these negative emotions into violence, we deal with them in a way and help reduce the high incidence of murders within our society.