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When panty disappear is time fuh shame

May 22, 2009 Dem Boys Seh, Features / Columnists

Everybody who hear ‘bout thief think that is somebody who walking de streets only looking fuh wha dem ain’t put down. Nuff people gun be surprised that dem have more thief wukking wid dem than dem have on de road.
Dem boys seh that these days you can’t even put down nutten. Dem sit down in a television office waiting fuh a ticket to go to some gay party that a reporter organise. De big editor put down he Blackberry pun he own desk and go in de studio. He walk back inside and something tell he to go and pick up he phone.
He see a number wid some star and de man who organizing de gay party start fuh tremble. Is thief he go fuh thief de man credit. He ain’t ask. He charging people $1,500 to go to he gay party and he still thiefing.
He ain’t get money from de phone because de editor come back quick but he gun lose pay fuh de attempt.
De thing that got dem boys worried is that this reporter can’t even talk good and he want credit in he phone. Fuh talk to who?
Is de same thing happen at de Waterfalls paper. De same editor put down he phone and when he ketch heself, credit gone, and nobody ain’t know. He find out that de reporter girl who go fuh sell she phone fuh buy credit suddenly talking to she friend.
She stop talking when de boss ask if any of dem read de very paper dem wukking fuh. When he ask all who read de papers fuh put up dem hand she try a thing. All it tek was one question and she hand come down quick. She didn’t read bout de bad state of de sewage system and de story deh big in de papers.
Dem boys seh that de sewage story really stink. Of de 24 pumps in de city only three working and is Uncle Freddie who mek de discovery. Dem boys seh that he had to be looking fuh de stuff or he was searching fuh scrap iron fuh sell fuh pay he rates and taxes.
Anyhow, all of a sudden de government find $300 million fuh fix de situation but not a word of how de situation get so bad and why it couldn’t fix. Of course de Minister who got responsibility suddenly realize that more people using de system suh it got to overflow.
But how that can happen when de stuff running through pipes to de sea all de time? And fuh show that de system wukking de government spend a whole heap of money fuh even build some extension to accommodate a hotel that ain’t coming no more.
Is de same waste of money got people failing to get dem NIS money. Roger nearing 60 and he mek up he NIS already. But dem boys seh that dey have people who is 68 and dem can’t get dem own. Even Bharrat shaping to collect NIS and he ain’t even meet 50.
Dem reporters at de Waterfalls paper now doing some investigative pieces, except that dem can’t get certain things right. Dem talk bout a boat that some fishermen find long after everybody else solve de riddle.
Dem ain’t even find out that Robert of Agriculture lef a sugar meeting fuh go to de States fuh he friend daughter wedding. Dem boys want fuh know if he was so hungry that he had to go to wedding house in de States fuh get seven curry. But dem ain’t got leaf up there.
Dem same reporters couldn’t see how Pegasus sell right under dem nose and how some big businessmen vex because dem had an eye pun de hotel. De plan was fuh get Colin Mack to get dem gyal and then dem woulda get a casino licence. Badal tek de rug from under dem foot.
And what about de underwear that disappear from de police station. De thing was to go as evidence in de Colin Mack trial but it disappear. Dem boys believe that a police woman thief it because it look fancy. She had it on because dem does search bag at de station.
Is when Henry de top cop holler suh hard that dem start an investigation and de panty end up back in de station. Dem boys seh that if de police investigators did ask all who had on panty to step forward dem woulda ketch de scamp.
Talk half. Lef half.

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