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Invaluable humour

Feb 04, 2009 Features / Columnists

The Parrot loves a good joke. Reading the newspapers and following international developments on television recently, a number of issues I stumbled upon caused me to chuckle. Basically all of these issues are of a serious nature, yet it’s difficult to restrain one from laughing.
Much has been said about the current global financial crisis and its impact across the world. Some companies have failed while others were fortunate to benefit from a bailout. Some international banks and other financial institutions are hard hit. Many industries, including the Auto industry in the USA, are seeking help from government.
Herein lies my amusement. I saw a news item on one of the many international channels in which representatives of the Porn Industry were lobbying for a government bailout! Yes, the Porn industry! They were vehement in their representation for such assistance citing their invaluable contribution to the entertainment industry and by extension, the economy. Wow! Invaluable! I can only imagine the related debates. Is this an indication of the impact of the global recession? Maybe Hugh and his Bunnies can so elaborate.
Aside from the global economic woes, some local stories did provide “invaluable entertainment”. A transformer was allegedly stolen from GPL and installed at a business entity downtown. If it is true what the power company is alleging, then, how does one “execute” such an “operation”? This is not something that can be hidden in one’s pocket. It will take men to load and unload. When and how does a company realise that something of that size is missing? How did it get out?
Talking about getting out, a prisoner allegedly removed the sanitary fittings from the lock-ups at the Turkeyen Police Station and escaped through the hole. Innovative? Daring? How no one heard when the toilet was being removed? Was he the only one in the lock-up?
You can see now why I was tickled. It doesn’t stop here. The Deputy Mayor stumbled on his way to present the City’s 2009 budget. He lost his footing! If it were the Mayor we would understand. Robert stumbling? Was the budget that heavy? Does it contain too much “pork”? Did his knees get weak? Was the step in a derelict state as the financial situation there? Was it that Keith was standing at the top of the stairs so that when Robert raised his head and saw him, he got startled?
If that were the case, then Keith is ensuring that he is on top of things there!
Just a stone’s throw away from City Hall at the Magistrates’ Court a few days ago, a man was caught practising “obeah” on the Magistrate. What a silly thing to do! Just outside the court? His “worshiping” outside led to him facing Her Worship inside. I am sure he will be inside for a while.
The management of the Guyana Chronicle discovered that many copies of the paper were being stolen. The alleged culprit was a staff; a pressman. Apparently this practice which provided “invaluable” financial gains to the accused has been going on for a while. Now, this guy has to be a pioneer. Who would have conceived that the there was money in “smuggling” the Chronicle?
He clearly had a secure market; a market that was in demand for the State Media publication. Now, who said Chronicle doesn’t sell? Who said that the paper doesn’t have a high circulation? Who said that the paper isn’t valuable? Only valuable things are stolen, right? I haven’t heard of other papers being stolen. I am sure Mark and others over at Lama Avenue are having a laugh! Priceless! Squawk! Squawk!

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