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Hammy think he bad

Oct 17, 2008 Dem Boys Seh, Features / Columnists

Nuff things happen this week and it look like if more gun happen because is like de case of de old bull and de slaughter house. Is also de case of li’l boy bossing big man. Dem boys see nuff time when li’l boy mek big man cry and like dem gun see it again.  Hammy decide to build a monument fuh dem 11 Guyanese who dead when de plane dem was in crash off Barbados. De plane was Cubana suh people call dem who dead de Cubana victims.
Everybody build a monument except Guyana. Even Barbados got a monument suh Hammy tek it pun heself to build one in Guyana. He didn’t get de money suh he get a private company fuh help build de monument. But even before he build de monument he hold one and two thing and he invite Bharrat and Sam and all dem big one.
Now that he start fuh build dem same big one decide to bruck down de monument. Was sheer laugh de other day. Hammy guh and sit down pun de monument, pull up he pants and pull down he shirt. He had two big gun in he waist.  Dem boys never see a bulldozer man back off suh quick. Dem boys seh that Hammy is de real old time bad man because de monument still lef and nobody nah want drive de bulldozer to bruck it up.
Gilhuys is another bad man. He mek de police frighten. He lick up a man minibus and he call de police but dem didn’t come because dem couldn’t find bullet proof vest. One of dem remember how one of dem squaddie pass and see Gilhuys vehicle park and shots fire and de police end up in hospital.  This time dem seh dem have to go to de vehicle and once de man inside dem wasn’t even passing deh. Dem didn’t want to tek chance because de man might not have any licence. De last time he gun didn’t have licence.  Is Henry Greene who mek de whole force know that de vehicle didn’t have licence, de driver didn’t have licence, and dem boys ain’t even sure if he still got he licence to be a magistrate. He going to court Monday and is he and de licence magistrate.
Akeel, de Chief Labour Officer show dem, though, that he got licence fuh sleep. He guh wid he Minister to a forum to talk about tackling some problem in de country. Sleep tackle he and while de Minister talking he decide to sleep. De PS hunching he steady but Akeel refuse to wake up. He only wake up when he hear he photo appear in de paper pun de front page. He get vex. He tell dem boys how Manzoor start fuh talk bedtime story and he couldn’t help heself. Dem boys seh that nobody should tell Akeel anything because he learn from dem in Parliament. Every time Parliament meet half of dem does sleep.
But Manzoor is not de only minister who causing problems. Frank join wid de hard times paper fuh sponsor Sports Quiz. He use taxpayers’ money and he ain’t got money fuh pay dem Carifesta people. If that ain’t stupidness dem boys ain’t know wha is stupidness.
Imagine dem ask four stupid question in de quiz. De fuss one is ‘Who is de lone female Guyanese in this year’s West Indies cricket team and which club is she from?’  That easy.  It like ABC. Is Jenny Westford. She does play fuh Roger Luncheon Cricket team.  ‘Who is de last Guyanese to captain the West Indies Under-19 team? Everybody know that one.  Is de boy from Unity; not Shiv. Bharrat Jagdeo. Who was de man of de match in the final when Guyana won the inaugural Stanford 20/20 competition? He in everything. Bobby Ramroop.
Which cricketer opened the batting and bowling in the recently concluded Senior inter-county one day cricket competition?  Our boy. Winston Brassington.
And this man get he birth certificate yesterday and he came to de Waterfalls paper fuh a job.. How he can get one should have been another quiz question from Frank and Bobby…Talk half. Lef half.

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