UNCLE FREDDIE AND HIS CHINESE-MADE TOILET BOWL

Oct 06, 2008 Features / Columnists, Peeping Tom

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I was not surprised to learn that the handle of Uncle Freddie’s toilet cistern had broken off. Even the most durable of handles are made to deal with only so many flushes.
Considering the trash that he has been writing in recent times, and if such writing is a measure of what he has inside his mind, I can well imagine what he has within his bowels. No wonder the toilet handle gave out.
This is a man that you would believe is beyond reproach. From his constant harping on the mistakes of all and sundry you would believe Uncle Freddie knows it all. You would believe that he is infallible; that he does not make any mistakes.
Yet it was surprising to note his confession that he made a mistake in purchasing a counterfeit toilet bowl. However in typical egotistical fashion, this self-centered columnist does not blame himself for the mistake, Instead, he condemns an entire nation.
Yes, the most populous nation in the world is condemned as a nation without production standards simply because he, Uncle Freddie, bought the wrong toilet bowl.
I have known persons who would condemn a product that they found deficient. I know of persons who would swear that they would never again shop at a store in which they may have purchased some product which they subsequently found to be unsatisfactory.
But to condemn a nation of over one billion persons, a nation which over the past decade has been the fastest growing economy in the world, a nation that is now sending people into outer space, a nation that has a safe nuclear energy program, a nation that produces superior goods for the Western market, is all too much.
To condemn an entire civilization simply because of two bad experiences he has, one of which he admits was his fault, is really a case of disoriented thinking.
If you buy a Bubble Man, especially if you buy it in the North American market, it will work ninety-nine per cent of the time. However, you cannot expect it to blow bubbles if you do not put soap or foamy water inside of it. I do not understand how Uncle Freddie could expect a Bubble Man to blow bubbles if he does not put soap water into the device.
Secondly he may be wrong about the counterfeit toilet bowl. He may be wrong because he does not understand globalization and the outsourcing of production. Most of the items that are sold under brand names are not manufactured in the countries that have right to the patents.
No, most of these products are made under contract in countries such as China, Singapore, Indonesia and India. So, the fact that he may have bought a toilet bowl, the patent of which is held in England, does not mean that this toilet bowl is made in England. In fact that bowl is most likely now not made at all in England but is made utilizing cheap labour in South-East Asia. I am surprised that the professor does not know this.
Of course a great many substandard products are on the market and we must always be careful about these.  A great many of these also come from China. There is no question that a great many things are pirated, including pharmaceuticals, in clear violation of copyright laws. However these laws also have another side to them. They are also intended to protect large producers and in some developing countries it is clear that when it comes to certain products they will not allow their people to die because of copyright protection. The debate is therefore not one-sided.
I would like to assure Uncle Freddie that if he becomes less materialistic, he will find that a great many of the products made in China are quite okay. He will discover that China produces top-class and high end products for the American market. Even some of the lesser quality products that are sold in our market are good enough.
Had it not been for the many cheap Chinese products in our stores, a great many Guyanese would not be able to manage.
I have quite a few Chinese products that I use. They work. I do not expect them to last a lifetime. If they did I may not have been able to afford them. I want them to work for a certain period and in most instances they do.
For example, I have a jersey that I wear that was made in China. I have it for two years now and I paid one hundred Guyana dollars for it.
I do not mind if it now begins to get a few holes. It has served its purpose as far as I am concerned.  I am happy with the Chinese products that I have.
China is no underperformer. China ranks with the rest of the world in terms of its engineering prowess. China is also on the cutting edge of technology in a number of areas.
However, there is no way any country and I mean any country in the world can guarantee that every single product it produces will be free of defects. And there is no way any country can produce a toilet bowl handle to suit Uncle Freddie’s needs.  By the way Uncle Freddie, if the handle of the cistern is broken, you can always replace it. Or better yet, switch to a pit latrine!

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